How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

Q: What did Hellen Keller say to the pizza delivery man A: Stop raping me.

An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Doesn't matter, he's not coming

What's the difference between an elephant and a toaster. A lot of things.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm dyslexic couldn't tell, could you?

Why did the man stand on one foot? Because he had one leg.

what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

Why'd humpty dumpy fall of the wall? Someone threw a fridge at him

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? No.

AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

knock knock who's there Berry Joe Berry Joe who? I just told you, Berry Joe. oh.

Why is Dominic's nick name big D? Because the first letter in his name is D.

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

Oh my God, my friend just got hit by a truck. Lets go get ice cream

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

Eine blonde Frau mit ihrem Sohn in Walmart, da sie die Lebensmittel-und Getränkebereich zu nähern, sehen sie ein mexikanischer Mann Blick in die Eier. Der Mann bittet um Hilfe aus der blonden Frau über die Qualität von Eiern. Sie sagt, ABD Eggs sind die besten, so dass die mexikanischen Kerl entscheidet, dass. Beim Verlassen des kleinen Jungen zeigt auf den Mexikaner Jungs Hut und ruft: "Aliens!" die Mutter bekommt wirklich peinlich und ruft ihren Sohn für sein Verhalten und sagt, es ist nicht richtig. Die Mutter wird erleichtert, dass sie sagen, dass die mexikanischen Kerl konnte nicht hören, da er Musik hören. Auf dem Weg aus der Mutter entdeckt einen violetten Flüssigkeit tropft aus der mexikanischen Jungs Haar. Sie fragt ihn, und er antwortet "Sein das Haargel". Die Blondine und Sohn nickt und setzt auf ihr Leben

what a filthy dirty mess also dirt

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from a KFC slaughterhouse, and proceeded forward to avoid getting caught. However, the chicken did not consider the childhood lectures off his parents about crossing the road safely, and got ran over by a black Golf GTI, and died instantly.

An owl turns to the other owl. He has to, he can't move his eyes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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