Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

So a Quadriplegic walks into a bar.....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Did you hear about the blonde that went to college? She got a degree.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile "robin, get in the batmobile"

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

And then i said what about breakfast at tiffanies, and then you said i hate that movie.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the cricket say to the bear when it entered it's den? Nothing,crickets comunicate by rubbing their back legs together to create vibrations and sound,and it cannot be understood by any other animal besides crickets.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Stephen Walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is funnier then 25 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hashtag

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the Muslim say to the Sikh? "Hello. Lovely weather today."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops