Knock Knock Who's There? Just open the damn door I forgot my key and I really need to pee

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why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it was hit and killed by a vehicle, much like all animals that try and cross roads. created by KA

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"Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains." "Well that sounds like a mental illness and I deal predominantly with physical ailments"

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Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

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why are you people on anti-joke? BECAUSE you have NO LIFE !

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

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Q.) How do you fit a baby into a bowl? A.) With a blender! Q.) How do you get it out? A.) With Tostitos! -Sebastian and Chris (aka 100 and Zelot) (we did not make this joke, we just had to share it)

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Why was the man cold? Because he was dead.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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Why did a duck cross the street? It didn't. It was hit by a car.

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Women's sports.

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What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

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knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the situation -Tag

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Person 1: What did the narwhal say to the other narwhal. Person 2: I don't know... What? Person 1: How am I supposed to know? Shortly after a serious argument breaks out.

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Why do you go to a black mans yardsale? To buy something cheap. Why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because it is illegal.

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Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and then leave.

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What is black and white and red all over? a nun that got raped.

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why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

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Whats sad about 4 black guys in a cadillac driving over a cliff? A cadillac seats 5

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Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

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Your time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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