How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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How do you have sex with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs sitting on a bench? Nothing. Why would you harrass a guy with no arms and no legs.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

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hey

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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I know Mandarin, He's a good friend of mine

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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Chuck Norris. I'm Done. That's my joke.

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What did the fish say? Moo

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Joseph. Joseph who? Joseph Brown. Oh, hello Joseph! Why don't you come in? No thank you.

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I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

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Nikii manaj is 99.9% fake on her body

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Hope you all drop the soap in prison

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A king's son's birthday came one day and the king asked what he wanted. "You can have anything in the world son." He would say. The prince answered,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." So for his birthday he got a rollar costar, a new car, a water park, a castle, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. The same answer went out of his mouth for three years. One day the prince was driving in his car, and he got into a terrible car accadent. And while he was in the ER and saying his last words, his father asked,"Son, before you die, i must know, why did you want purple ping pong balls for your all of those birthdays?" And the prince said,"Well I wanted them because-" and then he died.

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I had my period 3 days ago.

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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whats really hot the sun

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A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops