Two penguins were taking a bath. One said "pass the soap." The second penguin replied, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?"

An airplane crashes into a state park. There are no survivors. Susan continues her stroll in the park, considering she is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair, she isn't aware of the nearby disturbance

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 murdered 4 and 5 then raped 10

Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its coop was on fire.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Thats impossible because he cannot walk.

Nickelback ranked number 1 as greatest rock band according to rolling stones magazine!

Do you know what's not right? Left.

i was going to say a gay joke butt f*** it.

So there was this Afghan with a backpack on a train... he was going to work.

Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

Bloody kids ...

why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

How do you stop a black guy from drowning? You take your foot off of his face

Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

Two tubes of ice cream are sitting in a freezer, one turns to the other and says "its bloody freezing in here" God then corrects this apparent mistake in the combined laws of physics and biology

When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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