Your Mamas So Fat That When She Jumped Into The Ocean All The Whales Swam Around And Started Sinqinq (We Are Family Even Though Your Fatter Than Me.)xD

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was both deaf and blind and both senses are essential to a driver

What happened in your mom's locked bedroom last night I don't know

What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

What did Dela Ware? Nothing.

A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

what did Santa say to the 3 hookers? Merry Christmas!

Chuck Norris doesn't do pushups, his personal trainer designed a regiment for him that didn't involve them.

Q.What did the muffin say when the other muffin said, "How ya doin'?" A."HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!"

A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock. who's there? well, its not suzie.

What's the difference between a jew, a muslim and a christian. They follow different belief systems

What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

what did the doctor say to the woman? I have 3 testicles

Your everything I've ever dreamed of you sing like a bird your gorgeous your funny your friendly your sensitive your caring your unique and one day I will kill you.

If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

3 Mormon men walk by a blonde woman eating a banana. They are not distracted by this and continue their journey of spreading Christianity.

You momma's so ugly your dad left her.

What do you call a mexican driving a plane? Well.. nothing because you can't drive plane's but if a Mexican man was able to FLY a plane, he would be a pilot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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