Matt Damon

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

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What do you get when you have 10 kids in a church? A lot of rape cases.

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A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

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What do you call a mexican hopping over fences - A parkour Artist

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Daniel Textor can suck a gooch he's such a F - A - GGGGG!! Let's beat him up at lunch.

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What do u call a women between to black guys? -loose

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Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

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Why are black people faster than white people? They are descended from a lineage where athleticism was more greatly selected for in the evolutionary process.

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What did Little Jojo get for Hanukah? Nothing he is Muslim.

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

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A black man walks into a bar. A few minutes later a jewish man enters. Next door, a twelve year old girl is crying over the tragic death of her mother due to terminal cancer.

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I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

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Why is Joel so gay and skinny? He was raised by goats with eating disorders.

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Yo mama is so fat she went on a diet and lost weight.

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why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

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1 man walks up to a tiger and eats cheese toast with brownies and butter and wonders about the stars the end james

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Did you see Ray Charles's house? No. Yeah, neither did he.

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What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

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Mindfuck: They call you a patient where medics are because they do not want you to become impatient. The Coronel is the Kernel of the army (coronel sounds a lot like coronel no?) Sergeant = Sir gent. as in Sir gentle(man) Ok, so if you experience insanity one day, does that make you insane forever? In that case I was born and will die hungry and thirsty. Sigmund Freud= Sickman fraud. General: The guy you should generally listen to if you are in the army. 3.14 ratebay = PIRATE BAY! Why is Satan the antichrist, humans killed him :P Satan only "tempted his thirsty brother with water at the desert" Jesus showed real power by saying "NO WATER WHEN I AM THIRSTY IS BAD FROM MY BROTHER!"

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? There are certainly innumerable differences, but, in general, humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike when you eat them they die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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