what do you call a blonde that spends fifteen thousand dollars at a bar? an alchoholic.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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26 because if 25 is funnier than 24, 26 should be even funnier right?

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Why does batman wear a mask? Because if he didn't every enemy would know who he was, go to his house a brutally murder him.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

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Why did I put the baby into the blender feet first? So I could see its facial expression

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how do you drown a blonde? strategically place a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a swimming pool (or just a regular sticker because, quite honestly, they won't be able to tell the difference as the water fills their lungs)

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A blonde walks into a bar... Typical

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A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

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tobi is so gay that he is the mayor of sanfrancisco

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Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrarri? A dead baby is a non-living human, while a Ferrarri is a brand of car.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What do you call a highschooler who smokes weed, shops at the mall, and has date-raped one girl so far? Popular.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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what do you call a baby that's just been crushed by a piano. a mess for a cleaner to deal with. think about his health. after that he might get a disease from the body and he might not get to sleep as it is a haunting sight.

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Who's there? Knock Knock.

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown glue

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Why did sally fall of the swing? SHE HAD NO ARMS!

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Why'd Katie fall off the swing? She had no arms

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One morning a man was frustrated at the dining table. His wife ask "What's wrong?". He says "I can't fit this stupid puzzle pieces together." His wife asks "What's it a picture of?" The man says "A rooster" The wife says "Honey, put the cornflakes back in the cereal box." The man says "no".

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why do i want to get raped because then its not rape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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