there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Why did the boy drop his Ice cream? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him.

Q: what is the difference between a baby stroller and a black man. A: I don't try and hit black men when they cross the street.

A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says "What the hell was that all about?"

what did the chicken say to the vet? nothing chickens dont talk

Do the Helen Keller... become mute, deaf, and blind.

How many monkeys can play COD at once? It depends on how many controllers you have.

If you are my friend like it!

why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

what's retarded and has red hair? You. ;)

what did the right wing jew say after he was arrested for murder? bt we went through the holocust

What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

What do you do if you see a bleeding Mexican in your front yard? Quickly respond to the accident and supply the wounded victim with first aid.

what do you call a white man surround by a bunch of black men in prison a congraulation ceromony (and gang rape) pppppppppppppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

Your mama so stupid. She tried to climb over a glass wall to see the other side

Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

A grasshopper hops into a bar and orders a drink. "Hey! We have a drink named after you!" exclaims the bartender. "You have a Melanoplus Differentialis?" asks the grasshopper. "Yes."

Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

What's better than a worm in your apple? No worms in your apple.

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they are highly trained astronauts taking part in a multi-year space journey to explore part of the solar system that man has never dreamed to be feasible.

Dylan Hodge likes to lick his mums penis to sleep every night.

what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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