What do you get when you cross North Korea and the boston marathon? BOMBS! :(

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What happened when a 16 year old guy went over to his friends party? found out he wasn't friends with anyone there, got kicked out and committed suicide.

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Why did the woman walk into the men's clothing store? She's a lesbian. Why did the man walk into the womens clothing store? He had to buy his mom a birthday present.

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Whats big, round, and full of helium? Michaels Balloon head!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out it's an orange

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Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

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Why weren't there any black people at the book sale? Black people don't read.

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A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

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im a straight dude and all the gay dudes at school make fun of me oh wait i wrote that backwards

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Yo mama's so fat that she should probably go on a diet to avoid the risk of getting a cardiovascular disese.

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A man walks into a bar and takes his seat. After a minute, someone shouts "133!" and this is followed by a couple of slight chuckles around the room. Later, "57!" is heard from the corner, followed by harsh laughter. After a while, someone shouts "66!" which is met by an uproar of uncontrollable laughter. The man, confused by the evening's events, asks the barmam what is going on. The barman explains, every joke has been told countless times so instead of reciting them, they are numbered and people call out the numbers. The man catches on to this, and therefore shouts "453!" which is followed by a deadly silence, because no one had heard that particular joke before, so 453 was just a number to them.

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How tall is the grass in Germany? ZIS HIGH! *put hand about an inch and half off the ground* I mow it about every ozher week

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How much coke can Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men.

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Why did the samurai commit Sepuku? Because it is an honorable Japanese tradition.

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Q: how do you crush a Chinese man's dreams? A: tell him he is worthless and will never prosper.

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Tommy got hit by a truck Knock knock Whos there Not tommy

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What do Jews suck? Because they lie, steal money, and start wars.

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Why Oscar lives with elephants in a zoo ? Because he's an elephant.

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Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

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So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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How many Freudians does it take to screw your mother - I mean, a lightbulb?

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Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

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Who has downs this joke

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what did the blind kid want for christmas? world peace.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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