A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel in the front of his pants. He is given some very strange looks from the patrons both due to the fact that he has a steering wheel in his pants and because people wearing traditional pirate garb are a rarity.

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea. That would depend on what time you are reading this. As i have no control over this, I am unable to inform you of China's current time. Perhaps you should look into a watch, world clock, or some other device capable of telling the time. That is not the Purpose of this website. However, there are numerous other places for this. God luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can, and only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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George Bush does not care about black people.

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what do a jew homosexual and a latino all have in common? human dignity.

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Nicolas Cage's acting.

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Where do astronaut cows go? Nowhere. There's no such thing as an astronaut cow.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: What kind of bread would you like, brown or white? Penguins answers: Well, it doesn't really matter since I drove here.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots. They all miss.

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What's the difference between Hitler and shit? Shit has a shower in the morning.

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A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

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hey guys what's up?

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dur dur dur dur said the child born during an earthquake

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whats beter than a dead pile of babies? the alive one that has to eat its way out

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How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

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whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

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What happened to the Californian who drove off into the sunset. He died. You can't drive in the ocean.

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What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

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A.how does a penguin change a light bulb? A.the same way all other penguins change a lightbulb

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why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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whats a dick a dick

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So did you hear what happened to the deaf guy? He didn't either

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roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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