The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

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roses are brown, violets are brown, who the hell sh** on my garden?

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Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

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What's green and has wheels? A bus. I lied about the green.

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Why did the fat kid break his leg? He got hit by a car

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What did the mentally retarted student get on his SAT? Drool

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A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

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roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

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What's the difference between a red Ferrari and a pile of deal babies? The red Ferrari is not in my garage right now.

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What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

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roses are red violets are blue i have deep vein thrombosis .... perpendicular albatross

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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What's green,has 4 legs and lives in a tree? A pool table

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How do you spell Madeleine Mccann? I A N

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I work for a Jewish Carpenter. He pays me minimum wage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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I am a n1gger.

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What's worse than finding an apple in your wo- wait, what?!

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Why'd Sam run away Because charlie bit his finger

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What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

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Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

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fart+fart=poop

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What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

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"Spell 'horse'" "H-O-U-Z-E" "No, that's incorrect. You failed the spelling test, you stupid fool."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops