An Ethiopian field worker goes into work one day and finds out he was fired. Agriculture in Ethiopia is bad because it doesn't rain much.

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Why is it hot outside? Because God made it so.

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Why do Jews make sure their cars can stop on a dime? So if something happens unexpectedly when they are driving they have a better chance of avoiding a dangerous collision.

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A man was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell, but was finally subdued. His attackers then stabbed him. He later died from his injuries.

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Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

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What did the milk say to the oatmeal? I came from a cow nipple.

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What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

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What's another word for a priest? Rapist

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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Horton Hears... Rape and violence and doesn't do anything about it.

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A little boy started choking on a condom. His father came and was in a great panic. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to lose you!" he cried over and over again. Then his wife came in and said "it's alright darling, there's plenty more in the drawer". "Oh, thank God for that, I thought I lost it there!" dad replied.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

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Obamacare haters

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Justin Bieber walked into a gay-bar, The whole world applauded.

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says"what can i get for you Sarah Jessica Parker"

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How much did the Holla Cost?

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Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Throw a brick at him.

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Me: Hey, Johnny! Do you see that Tree? Johnny: No. Me: Neither do I.

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What did the liberian man say to the kid he just spat on? You have ebola. and probably aids.

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what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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