How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two.

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Michael Hoffman leaves the gym

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What's a skateboard without wheels A snowboard

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Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Why did Mary punch herself in the stomach? -she was pregnant

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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Knock knock Whose there? Interrupting doctor Interr-- You have cancer.

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heres a great game to play... DEATH TO BABIES!

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A man walked into a bar and it hurt.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

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Knock Knock Get off my property or I'll call the cops on you!- Napoleon Dynamite

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What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

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Joay impistato is a fig

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if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

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What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

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What did the black man say to the Mexican? What a fine day it is!

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I have two hands. Some people dont.

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Q: What's funnier than a dead baby? A: Two dead babies.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing, it was a tragic day for the world.

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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What's the difference between a girl's mouth and her vagina? There is none. I want my penis to be inside both of those things.

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69

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Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops