How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had cancer.

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The Irish man was sober.

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Smart Blondes

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What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin Holy shit a talking muffin

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

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how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

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What do you call six million jews? Dead.

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Q: If Jack Bauer is partially gay, then what are you? A: His sidekick -Ryan Vallee

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A catholic priest held a puppet show at a kindergarten. The children were a very polite audience and the event was considered a great success.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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A black man walks up to a jewish man in a bar. They engage into a nice conversation, seeing how they were friends back in college.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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How much did the Holla Cost?

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

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Did I tell you about the day I put PaulMckenna on a hypnotic state so he believed he put me in a trance? That was fun, everybody applauded, then he got sad when it was not him they where applauding at, funny guy, a bit of an amateur, he spends hours "priming" people in a hypnotic state, and then in his videos triggers it so it makes it seem like he does it instantly, next to Igor Ledohowsky and Richard Bandler, I might just be one of the best and youngest hypnotists alive. Speaking of which, my wife knows the complicated yet strong feelings I got for you, and feels safe around me because of the same reasons you do, and the fact that I can spot a worry and a tear before people do, especially those I love and care about. Wait I am not done, I just need to eat before I space out.

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A nun in a blender.

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tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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A man walked into a bar, was surprised to find his wife with another man, and had a heart attack.

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Why didn't the black man feed his family? They'd eaten about an hour ago.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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