What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

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Two 50 year old men walk into eachother on the street. one was born in a hobo shack and another was born in a mansion. what did the rich one say to the poor one? Hi, whats your name?

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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Three people are stranded on an island. They are captured by a tribe of cannibal natives. The natives say " find 10 fruits of the same kind and bring them back" The first guy comes back with apples The natives say " shove them up your buttox without showing any sign of emotion" The firs guy gets to the second apple and then woos in pain the natives kill him The second guy comes back with blue berries he gets to the ninth berry and laughs. The natives kill him. The two guys are in heaven. The fist guy says " you could've survived why did you laugh?" the second guy replies," I saw the third guy coming back with pineapples"

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A proton and a neutron talk to each other. Two atoms are walking down the street one day, and one of them says to the other: "Hey, wait up a second. I think I lost an electron" The first atom replied, "Are you sure?" The second atom said, "Oh, wait. Never mind. I found it."

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WHY DID THE WHITE MAN TALK TO THE BLACK MAN TO LIGHTEN HIM UP

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What is the difference between an Irishman and a plank of wood? Almost everything, including anatomy, chemical make up, mass etc

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Viciously beating your children with other recently beaten children.

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Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Whats better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Why did the man go to jail? He abused and later murdered his spouse.

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What is the difference between a duck?

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drake

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nick biggs ate a car well his name is nick BIGGS

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Stephen Walking.

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What did Roadrunner name his car? Turbo Tax.

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How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

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What did the fish say? Moo

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm colorblind

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Whats worse than a clock with no hands? Your mom with cancer.

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Woman's rights.

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what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

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What do you call a cow in the grass... A cow in the grass... Dumbas*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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