A Man walks in to a bar and orders a pint of lager, he notices something floating on the top of his drink so he calls over the bartender. "Excuse me, I think there's something in my dr-" The man's sentence was cut short as a man with a gun had just walked into the bar. He killed everyone, there were no survivors.

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A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? Generally one, however, in cases where the light fixture is unusually high, a ladder may be necessary. Some people like having a second person hold the ladder as they climb it. In this unconventional circumstance, it would take precisely two Jews to change a lightbulb. Also, Jews are bad people.

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I went to the game and saw a Mexican wave. So I waved back at him.

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Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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Wade's the father

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Yo Momma is so fat that she is heavier than most other women her age

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They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

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a hard working man goes home after a long day at work to find that his wife left him for his even harder working father.

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A guy walks into a bar. He's thirsty and wants a beer.

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Whats The Difference Between A Baby And A Watermelon ? You Can Throw One In The Air And Hit It With A Bat , And The Other Ones A Watermelon

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A woman walked into the doctors office with a black eye. The doctor asked: How did you get that? The woman said: I fell.

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Why did Sally eat popcorn? She was watching a movie

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Q: What has four legs and an arm. A: A pitbull on a playground

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Mr Webb *Hit keyboard loudly* -...

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A man walks into a bar and sees a jar filled with money. He asks the bartender, "What`s all this money for?" The bartender replies, "It`s Breast Cancer Awareness month and we are collecting donations." The man puts in $5, and continues on with his night.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. A. Knock, Knock! B. Who's There? Not Suzie.

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What do you get when you mix a panda,oklahoma,and a handle? The oklahoma panhandle.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Stephen Hawking raped your mom

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what's worse than the holocaust living jews

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why did the man tell a joke? to make people laugh

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A Knock, Knock B There's no door. What are you knocking on?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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