Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Notice how Anti-Joke MISSPELLED "user", writing "uses" instead. Probably most of you didn't notice until I posted this :)

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What happend to the gay kid that walked into iran. He got shot and killed ????

thumb_up thumb_down +24

whats worse than 10 dead babies in my garage? 11 dead babies in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: why was the cow in the middle of the road? A: because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do u call a women between to black guys? -loose

thumb_up thumb_down +24

SIMPLE EQUATION: John has 32 chocolate bars. He eats 28. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Cold camel scrotum.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You're momma's so fat, Oh wait. She's not.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Fox News.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Me: Hey, Johnny! Do you see that Tree? Johnny: No. Me: Neither do I.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why did the boy drown? because water entered his lungs and suffocated him.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are tits, Violets are tits, I love tits. Tits.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

You are in England which has a law about not moving traffic when these idk some kinda swans cross the road. You see a fat woman in a car and she is waiting for the swans to cross the road and she can't drive the car else she would get in trouble by law. What do you do? Feed her

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops