roses are blood violets are veins vampires are crazy and you are insane

Alex Eggbert

What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

Knock knock! Who's There? @HurricaneKris4 on Twitter Ok I'll follow you...

Whats the difference between a walnut and a baby ? Ones fun to hit with a hammer and the other is a walnut

That Awkward moment when your whole family dies

A man walked into a bar There were some other people there too

why are black people so good at basketball? because they all can run jump steal and shoot

What did Santa get for a young boy? A gun.

Why did the dog run away from home? Because dogs are absent-minded and they don't know any better.

whats your name? bumder:)

What did the man with scissors do? He cut his balls off.

Teacher: What's 2x2 John? John: (ignores teacher) Teacher: John! John: huh? Teacher: go on John: uh? 24?

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to see its chicks that got run over by a car.

motley crew

What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

When life gives you lemons, find someone with a papercut.

Me: Whats your favorite color? Joe: Blue! Me: Wrong

What's the difference between and black dick and a white dick? To get to the other side

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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