What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why couldn't the kid get into the pirate movie? Tickets were sold out.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I'm a brony. I'm a brony. I'm a brony. Screw this shit, I'm not a brony anymore. I'm a man. I'm a man. Screw this too. I'm dead, not in bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one potato say to the other. Let's get baked!( hope u dont mind that this isnt a anti-joke well i dont know what it is so sue me)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call a somone who murders someone else? black.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Chuck Norris' cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? the black baby is black

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

(speaking to an orphan) knock, knock who's there not your parents

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the bartender cry when a construction worker ordered a Jack and Coke? His son Jack had run away five years ago to sell cocaine; his father hadn't seen him since.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How much does a mexican immigrant get paid? Less an minimum wage.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happened to the newlywed couple who couldn't tell the difference between KY jelly and window putty? All their windows fell out.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's big, grey and can't climb a tree? A parking lot

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock Come in No you supposed to say who's there Oh, who's there? Jennifer Come in No, you supposed to say Jennifer who Oh, Jennifer who? Forget it

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What is worse than finding a worm in an apple? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why cant madeleine mccann play ps3? ive only got an xbox

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you get when you mix a mexican and a frenchman? A person of mixed racial heritage.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Bob Marley Shoot the Sheriff? Because he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats woorse then being stupid? kaelynn... aka big head

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Heath Ledger.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops