A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. "Yes" the man replies, because he is aware that the bartender wasn't actually asking if the day way long, but rather if the day was hard.

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It's Adam and Eve, not Steve and Eve!

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Why is the sky blue? Because it is.

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Yo momma's so dumb, she's not smart.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

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What's worse than your family dying in a fire? Nothing, that really sucks.

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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A dolphin walked into a bar, wait. . . dolphins can't walk, or go to bars.

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Out of all the sadness and death in the world...do you know what the worst part is? Mexicans are still hoping the border...

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why did the clown go to the hospital? i hit him in the leg with an axe.

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I once went seven years without sex, then I turned eight and my uncle raped me.

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George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 'Cause 7 slept with 8 and punched 4 in the face.

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Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

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knock knock who's there police

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What do you call something with no legs? A Cripple.

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What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

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you know whats weird about italians? their italian

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A black man walks in to a bar, and is promptly escorted from the premises, for being under the age of 21

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daniel thinks 30 rock is funny

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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Why did Jimmy go to the doctor? He had just been hit by a semi truck and his legs were severed. He died later that night.

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? .......................................................................................................................................... SEVEN EIGHT NINE!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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