....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

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What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating it's way out.

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Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

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why did the woman cross the road? to get groceries for making more sandwiches.

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I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other!

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Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

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Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

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what do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A: a piolt

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

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What did the mexican get for his brthday? A potatoe

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What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

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Cat got your tongue? Punch it in the face, and retrieve your tongue.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What's red and goes pop? A clip art of the word "Pop"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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A teacher notices one of her students clutching a cat. She asks him why. The boy, tearfully, explains that he heard his father tell his mother that he was going to eat her pussy when the kids left for school. The teacher laughs and, the class being 10-11 years old thereby at an age approaching biological curiosity, decides to mix this in with a sex education video she was planning on showing them a few weeks later. She then phones the boy's parents who come to collect the cat while reassuring the boy that it is in no danger. The cat was popular with the boy's classmates and they would often go to visit him as a result. Many years later, just after the boy started attending university, the cat was put to sleep at the age of 13 due to liver cancer. The boy placed a Facebook post in honour of his feline friend, which was spotted by a former classmate of his in a routine search who happened to be attending the same university. They ended up reacquainting and beginning a sexual relationship, which was how the boy lost his virginity and eventually blossomed into a 37-year marriage resulting in three children.

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There are two gingerbread men in an oven and the one says " it's hot in here" the other says "holy crap it's a talking cookie!!!!!!!!"

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

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What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

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There is this dylectic who can't spell.

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Q: Why did the girl fall off the swing? R: Because she had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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