A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican, a black guy and an octopus? I don't know but I don't like it.

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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Why did the womens basketball team beat the mens? the men were locked in a refrigerator

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Roses are red,nuts are brown,skirts go up,pants go down,body to body, skin to skin, when its stiff, stick it in,the longer its in, the stronger it gets,it goes in dry, comes out wet, its comes out dripping and starts to sag Its not what you think its a...Teabag

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what smells worse then shit Drew White

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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Knock Knock.

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Why did Coolio appear in the joke below? He did not, he was not for real at this particular situation... Well It was actually a typo because some douchebag told me Coolio sang that song and I forgot to change the name after finding the truth... Moral: YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

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Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

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What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Q: What is black, white, and red all over? A: A white wall with black and red paint just added onto it recently.

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Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

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There was once a joke without a proper ending and so

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whats the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? the ferrari is not in my garage.

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What is big and white and will kill you if it falls from a tree? My d**k.

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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How do you make a builder sad? You shit on his bricks.

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What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

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how much is a microwave full of dead babies? a fridge full of dead puppies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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