What's the square root of 69? 8.306623862918075

thumb_up thumb_down +59

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas?

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Oliver O'Farkle walks into a blue room carrying a bag of oranges and Swanson J. Doople walks into the same room in a parallel universe carrying a ballpeen hammer. How much collective space do the two women occupy and will they be able to make the 4pm train to Terre Haute? No, because the train is running late so transportation efficiency on the day in question proves impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A dyslexic Irishman walks out of a bra.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the stop sign say to the no smoking sign? Stop

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's red and on fire? My crotch

thumb_up thumb_down +13

matt shut up

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Yo Mumma so dumb she has to climb over a glass wall to see whats on the other side.... Yo Mumma's so fat when she walked past the tv she made me miss 5 series... Yo Mumma's so fat when god said let there be light she had to move out of the road. That's nearly all that I have, but if u have one leave it in the comment

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's worse than finding a hair in your sandwitch? Finding a dead baby in your salad!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the girl say to her tits? I wanna suck u.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the boy fail gym? He had cancer and had to amputate both of his legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the Chinese man cross the road? To get to the Chinese restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the tractor run over the little boy? because he was in the way!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

God

thumb_up thumb_down -19

roses are red, voilets are creepy, i can beat you in call of duty

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a sexually abusive man. Dad.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

What do you call a gay Jew? I don't know, but Jews are cool.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

pizzano is a tool.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What is the priest favorite book? The Bible

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What would be a good feature for this site? A search by keyword feature. (sorry...)

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why do latins like soccer so much? Because it's a very popular sport in the whole world.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops