Imagine Buzz Lightyear standing on the edge of a cliff. He jumps off hoping to fly. He manages to glide for a little bit until a bird crashes into him a cause one of his wings to break. What happens then? Simply imagine him turning into bird.

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Q: what do you call this?: the boi wuz ridin the scool bus and it crased in a wal. A: grammacally flawed

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Quess what the trash man did today? He took my trash.

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What did the guy with Alzheimer's say to his.... Wait, I forgot the joke

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. "Knock, Knock!" "Who's there?" "Not Sally"

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Why couldn't Michael ask out Mary? Because Mary had been dead for dead for 10 years.

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knock knock! fu ck off i'm a shift worker trying to sleep

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Why did people spend $100 on Kanye West's plain white T- shirt? Because it was a good looking T-shirt.

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What does Helen Keller put at the end of every sentence? A period.

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You know what's funnier than 24? 25.

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Did you hear about the blond who went to college? She got her masters. became and environmental scientist, married a nice man, and had two wonderful children. After retiring at age 65, she spent the rest of her days living in a cozy beachside house.

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What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? Get it repaired.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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Three men stood before Saint Peter at the pearly white gates. They were then sent straight to Hell for committing mass suicide in hopes of reaching a higher state of being through a device located on a meteor.

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Patient: Hey doc, I think I might have a tumor... Doc: Don't worry, it's all in your head.

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a ghost walks into a bar and sais BOO! The bartender then yelded AAAAHHH! and died of a hart attack.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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What has two thumbs and cancer? This guy.

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Dear mom, I'm wearing skinny jeans. If I can't get them off, Neither can the rapist.

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How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? Watermelons don't have feet.

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What's black and blue and red all over Sex

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had to arms. Knock knock Who's there? Well clearly not Sally

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Why did the pasta not taste good? Because your mom made it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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