Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

These might be offensive Events: * The Black Plague * The Columbine High-School Massacre * The Enron Scandal * The Great Depression * Hurricane Katrina * The Iraq War * Krakatoa * Mt. Vesuvius * September 11 2001 * Titanic * World War I and II People: * Adolf Hitler * Al Capone * Attila the Hun * Blackbeard * Caligula * Charles Manson * Ed Gein * Elizabeth Bathory * Idi Amin * Ivan the Terrible * Jeffery Dahmer * Josef Fritzl * Josef Mengele * Joseph Stalin * Kim Il-sung * The Ku Klux Klan * Nero * Osama bin Laden * Pol Pot * Saddam Hussein * The Taliban * Torquemada * Vlad the Impaler Diseases: * AIDS * Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis * Bubonic Plague * Cholera * Chronic Diarrhea * Cystic Fibrosis * Dysentery * Ebola Virus * Gonorrhea * Herpes * Leprosy * Mad Cow * Malaria * Necrotizing Fasciitis * Polio * Rabies * Scurvy * Smallpox Films: * Antichrist * Audition * August Underground's Mordum * Blue Velvet * The Boy in the Striped Pajamas * Cannibal Holocaust * Goodbye Uncle Tom * Gummo * Happiness * Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer * I Spit On Your Grave * Irreversible * Men Behind the Sun * Mysterious Skin * Once Were Warriors * Requiem for a Dream * Salo or the 120 Days of Sodom * Schindler's List * Taxi Driver * Vase de Noces Misc: * Alcoholism * Anorexia Nervosa and eating disorders * Arson * Bestiality * Cannibalism * Capital punishment * Castration * Child abuse * Colonoscopies * Coprophilia/phagia * Drug abuse/addiction * Electric torture * The gassing of cats and dogs that have been abandoned * Genocide * Human sacrifice * Losing one's favorite childhood toy * Mustard gas * Necrophilia * Neo-Nazism * One's grandmother dying * Pedophilia * Racism * Rape * Religious intolerance * Stillborn babies * Suicide * Walking on broken glass * Working on weekends Peter1-8

Two women are sitting quietly in a corner, minding their own business.

How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb 500 , 1 to hold the lightbulb, 499 to spin the house

What did the guy who walked into a bar say? Ouch

What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

Why did he die? He was sick.

"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

Penis

Why did the runner stop farting in the middle of his run? He ran out of gas.

John: Hey Bill, ORANGE you in the mood to go to a Phillies game? Bill: Yes! So let's make like a banana and raise our potassium levels drastically and leave right away to beat the rush hour traffic.

Three men sat at a pub, it reminded them of this joke they once heard

JEWS

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

68 :)

How do you get a fat man to drop a brownie? Make fun of him until he kills himself, and then drops the brownie.

Why did the chicken cross the road... He wanted to get away from all those jerks who kept asking him why he made the decisions that he did. he later committed suicide...

Why did the frog fall out the tree it was dead. Why did the second frog fall out the tree it was stapled to the first frog. Why did the third frog fall from to the tree peer pressure. Why did the fourth frog fall from the tree the third frog was his son. Why did the fifth frog fall from the tree he thought it was a game. Why did the sixth frog fall from the tree he shared the same body with the fifth frog

what's worse than finding out god isn't real? finding out he is

raping black women

Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

What happen to the guy who didn't breathe A. He died

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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