Knock knock Whos there? FUS ROH DAH

What did Freddie Mercurys father say at Freddies funeral. "Thats the cleanest hole our Freddies ever been in".

whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon ones a live the other isnt

How did the chicken cross the road? Chickens live in farms, they don't cross roads.

why did the chicken cross the road? -----it didnt

How does Helen Keller do her taxes? Unfortunately, she doesn't. Her friends have strongly encouraged her to proactively contact the IRS to see if she can undergo a repayment plan of some sort and obtain governmental assistance for her future filings.

Why does the sultan of Turkey wear red suspenders? So that his pants wouldn't fall down.

Why did the man go to the toilet with his brother? Because Mario and Luigi had to go down in it.

As Vanilla Ice once said, "If there's a problem ill resolve it."

What time does lunch usually begin on the other side of the world. Noon.

Canada AYY

what's retarded and has red hair? You. ;)

what's big fat and hairy yo mamma

whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

what do you call a black man being hung from a tree? -prejudice

A mama cow was sitting in the barn with her 3 babies. The first baby cow goes "Mom, why did you name me Daisy?" "Because a Daisy landed on your head when you were born" The second calf goes "Mom, why did you name me Rose?" "Because a Rose petal landed on your head when you where born." The third calf says "Aasdfghoiuytfghjkuiy" The mom replies "Shut up brick"

I got it Nero, lets just be friends for now and forget about the work I do here and you there.

Your mama so stupid. She tried to climb over a glass wall to see the other side

Knock, knock (No one was home)

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

What do you call 99 lawyers in a car going off a cliff with no driver and another lawyer running in the other direction? A dick move.

two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

Are you from Tennessee? Because I can tell by your accent.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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