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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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So a man enters a local paper's pun contest. He enters ten puns in hopes that one of them would win. But unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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Why did Martin go to school with no pants on? Because he had no legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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roses are red violets are blue i uhh umm hold on... the man with Alzheimers proceeds to think of the rest of his poem he wrote for his date, after an hour he remembers but his date has left and the staff proceed to guide him out and back to the insane asylum

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Q. what did the kid say to his foreign language teacher about the test? A: i dont understand this test, its like in a complete different language

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what do you say to someone acting like an idiot? hey, if you keep acting like an idiot im gunna hit you with a freakin bat , you stupid fubu!

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I WILL DESTROY ISIS

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Two black people jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? Who cares.

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What a russian says to another russian? I don't know, but it must be somthing in russian.

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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What did the Asian bookkeeper say to the Jewish dog? I love you

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

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Two black guys jump off a cliff, who wins? The black guy.

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What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

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What did the asian parent say to his kid when he got a D? -It's OK son, you will do better next time.

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Yo mama so stupid She took in part of an experiment and was indeed proclaimed stupid.

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asian, do math

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

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A mushroom walks into a bard and the bartender admonishes him and tells him to leave. The mushroom says "Aw, c'mon...you stupid jerk!"

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So, why is winter so terrible? Because, Napoleon was stopped by winter and we aren't all French.

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A man walks into a man walks into a man walks into a man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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