Chuck Norris walks into a bar. Everybody leaves except Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson never walked out alive

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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yo momma so fat that she's fat

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm about to kill you Don't scream, here's a lollipop

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Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

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how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

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If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

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You know what they say about big feet... Wow, those are some big feet.

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A man walks into a bar. Another man walks into a bar.

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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What do you get after putting bread in a toaster? -Toast.

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What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you f***ing racist.

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What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

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Why did the child die? Natural causes.

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A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

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What do you call a black man holding a pistol? A black man holding a pistol

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What do you call a black man driving a bus? By his name

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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my namew is jd

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops