why did the moose cross the road? to eat the baby.

Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel!

A Knock, Knock B There's no door. What are you knocking on?

How do you make a burns victim cry? You show them a mirror.

What sound does a baby make in a blender? Idk, i was too busy masturbating to hear.

A choir boy is hit by a car outside church. Someone runs to him and says "shall I fetch the priest?" The boy starts to mumble something but quickly loses consciousness, and later dies after 16 hours in ICU.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? a genetically disfigured fish please stop pollution.

A snake walks into a bar

Stephen Hawking raped your mom

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Poop

Jim and Dave walk into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll it be?" Dave is black.

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What object do bananas look like? Bananas.

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a woman.

What does Batman say to scare Robin? Don't make me get the bat!

How do you confuse a person from France? By screaming in english at the sky while pionting at him.

Whats big, round, and full of helium? Michaels Balloon head!

ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I LOVE YOUR MOMA CAUSE SHE STINKS OF POO :) BY VICKY CASSIDY, RENATA SZABO, ELLA AND HEIDI MCMILLAN

Do you know the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human, and one is an inanimate object.

What's pink and wrinkley and hangs out your pj's? Ya nanna :)

What is red and tastes like parsley? Red Parsley

Why does it take more than one blond to replace a light bulb? Because one had no arms, thus requiring the help of another person. It just so happened that that other person was a blond.

Stranger: Greetings. House-owner: No, you were supposed to say, "Knock, Knock". Stranger: Fine. Knock, knock... House-owner: Nobody's home. Stranger: These quirks are really getting on my nerve. Silly antics only serve to frustrate me. Oh, the irony!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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