What can Harry Potter NOT see with his glasses? His parents...alive.

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay in unimportant.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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If there are 500 bricks in an airplane and one falls out how many are there in he plane? 499. Name 3 steps to get a Elephant in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2. Put the Elephant in the fridge 3. Close the fridge Name 4 steps to get an Deer in a fridge. 1. Open the fridge 2.Take the Elephant out of the fridge 3. Put the Deer in the fridge 4. Close the fridge The Lion King is having a birthday party. Every animal came, besides one. Who was it? The Deer. Because hes trapped in the Fridge. The Deer manages to escape the fridge, and hes running late. he encounters Crocodile lake. How will he cross it? He will swim through it because the Crocodiles are at the Lion Kings birthday. Then suddenly, The Deer dies. How? The Brick hit him.

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Why is six afraid of seven? There might've been a little shooting accident a few days ago which put his mother in the ER. If anyone asks go to a bar and think in your head why you would ask something like that. Let it sink in.

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left... So they take the left and enjoy themselves at the place many considered the most wonderful place in the world.

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knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock knock zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz knock kock ding dong ding di-ding dong zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz sigh weeeeeeeeeewooooooooooooooooo zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz hey yo wake up zzz-oh-huh-what-whos there i've been yelling for like five minutes oh sorry jim will you let me in already all right

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Cold camel scrotum.

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my namew is jd

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A black man didn't walk into a bar

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why cant helen keller drive? because cars werent popularly accepted when she lived.

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Why are pirates called pirates? Because it derives from the Latin word, pirata.

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Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

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a black man, spanish man, and white man all fall off a building. and as they fall, i wonder: why are you laughing?

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roses are gray violets are gray everything's gray I'm a #$%ing dog

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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Yo mama is so fat she went on a diet and lost weight.

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How did the mermaid break her arm? She fell out of a tree.

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A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all stranded on a desert island for a few weeks. They get to know each other really well.

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What do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you....you pull the pin and trow it back

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What is the answer to number 7 on the test? Time for you to get a watch.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have AIDS go get checked

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What is the Civil War called in Virginia? The War of Northern Aggression.

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1:Nice comeback. 2: If I wanted my cum back, I would get it off your mom's face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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