how long does it take for a black woman to poop? women dont poop, especially not halle berry

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Guy: If you can guess what's in my hand, you can have it. Girl: If it fits in one hand, you can keep it!

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There were two muffins in an oven one muffin said, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin said, "AHHH A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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What do you call a guy being followed by about 30 others with high powered rifles? A military general serving for his country.

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A Jew and a German walk in a bar. they've accepted their peoples past and learned to move on with their lives

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Yo mamma is so fat she needs a highly dangerous gastrointestinal bypass and if she dies you will wish she had made more of an effort to diet.

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What do you call a black man who is poor, homeless, and HIV positive? Unlucky.

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What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

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A priest a rabbi and an iman are stuck in the desert. After walking for days without rescue or civilisation in sight, and rapidly running out of food and water, they decide to each pray to their respective gods for rescue, and in doing so solve the ultimate question of which religion is the true religion. They all die.

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A moose walks into a corner store and asks the lady where the Mashed potatoes are. The lady working behind the corner says "Down Aisle five..." The moose goes down aisle five and there are no Mashed Potatoes. -Tyler the Creator

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What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

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An Ethiopian field worker goes into work one day and finds out he was fired. Agriculture in Ethiopia is bad because it doesn't rain much.

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A Jew walks into a bar The bar owner looks at a gang of punks in the back and shouts "YOU! GET OUT!" The Jew leaves the bar.

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your mom is so old. she can legally get a senior discount

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Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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Whay was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had an extra penis

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Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? NOT SALLYYYY

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Who is a knob? ross d

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Alcatraz is reopened only for Kevin's ma

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What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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Hearpin my durp

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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