What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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3 dogs, a blue dog, a yellow dog, and a red dog. The owner was a man named Jeff. Now the blue dog was always sad so Jeff named him blue. The yellow dog was always scared so Jeff named him yellow. Now the red dog he was red because he had red fur, so Jeff named him red. One day when Jeff was reading his newspaper, he accidentally hit his coffee and it fell on the floor. Question: What did Jeff do? I don't know.

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If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

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Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

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what red black and white al over? a t.v I was kidding about the red part

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what is the difference between babies and trampolines? you take your shoes off when jumping on a trampoline

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Asians are a lot like spongebob They're terrible at driving and good at karate.

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a car drives off a cliff whos driving? an asin woman!

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What do you call your fist? Trying to talk to an appendage would indicate that you suffer from mental issues stemming from dysentery or lack of oxygen, and as a medical professional, I would recommend seeing a specialist.

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I beat my family.

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GOOD AFTERNOON KIND SIR OR MADAM THIS IS THE KUNDALINI EXPRESS MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER

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my namew is jd

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A bear walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What'll it be." The bear mauls his face off and kills several other patrons before police show up and fire three rounds in it's face.

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Why do black people like Basketball so much? Because it is a sport participated world wide. They just happen to like it too.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Q.If you are European in the bathroom, what are you in the kitchen? A. A woman.

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Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

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Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

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Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

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Why did the woman cross the road? She didn't. They are no roads in the kitchen.

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a bat and the others a watermelon

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? To get home.

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Q: What's the best way to get a woman to stalk talking? A: Ask them nicely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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