How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due the limited cognitive ability and a lack of critical thinking skills, the chicken mistakenly ventured across the road in search of grain. Luckily the chicken was not injured on this occasion, however other chickens may not be so lucky in the future.

What did the black man say to the Mexican? What a fine day it is!

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An old lady walks into a bar. She was the janitor.

I'm innocent its all Taggart he's the one instigating.

What's 9+10=? 19

What's chris benoit doing? Just hangin in the gym

Roses are flowers Violets are flowers

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

If Jimmy has 50 pieces of candy and eats 40 of them, what does he have now? Jimmy has diabetes.

My neighour knocked on my door at 2.30am last night, can u believe it? 2.30am? How rude I thought. Luckily I was still up, playing drums.

An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

Umm Q Umm 69 Best one ever

Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

Why did little Bobby put a firecracker in the dog's ass? Don't worry, he used lube.

Why does smokey bears wife never have kids? Because every time she gets hot smokey beats he with a shovel

wtf the enter the following thingie says I am here

Man is hit by a falling tree his friend immediately responds "Got Wood" the man is now paraplegic

Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AD i love squirrels

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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