Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- *Commits Suicide*

what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

knock knock who's there? Barbra Streisand Barbra Streisand who? Barbra? Streisand whoo oo oooo oo oo oo ooo ooo!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

Hi.

Your mom was diagnosed with aids. Her prognosis was 6 months....clearly this joke is about the Holocaust.

Where do black people get there hair cut? At a hairdresser.

p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

What did the white guy say to the black guy? I used to be black also. My name is Michael.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Someone threw birdseed.

what is a model plus a poop plus a rhino plus a flamingo a peice of floob split in half or a shelby koon

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

I just met you! And this is crazy! I just took bath salts, and yor face looks tasty!

Where did the moon get its degree? Unfortunately, they haven't installed any colleges for planetary satellites yet.

Nicolas Cage's acting.

why do they call it history? Women didn't do shit

Why did bobby fall of the swing? He had no arms -Knock knock -Who's there? -Bobby -But how? -I knocked with my diick -Oh

What do you call a black man working for Bank of America? A successful individual.

whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...