the

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Why do matt Daly jokes suck? Because he has Downs.

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a man is having trouble getting onto the internet on his home computer. so he he calls a computer technician to help him. \

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joe diragi makes paul look straight

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Q: What do you call a black girl with braces? A: A black and decker pecker wrecker

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Haikus are awesome but sometimes they don't make sense hippopotamus

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A man walks into a bar. The other one ducks.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Doctor- Mr. Smith I have some bad news for you. Mr. Smith- Just tell it to me straight. How long have I got? Doctor- Not long. Mr. Smith- OK.

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If you say woman really fast it sounds like make me a sandwich.

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Humpdy dumpty sat on a wall and enjoyed his day off

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You momma's so ugly your dad left her.

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What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

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Person 1: What did the woman say when - Person 2: I know! It doesnt matter, shes a woman

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Wanna hear a joke? JORDAN SANDERS IN A RELATIONSHIP.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He didn't, he got run over

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Three people are stranded on an island. They are captured by a tribe of cannibal natives. The natives say " find 10 fruits of the same kind and bring them back" The first guy comes back with apples The natives say " shove them up your buttox without showing any sign of emotion" The firs guy gets to the second apple and then woos in pain the natives kill him The second guy comes back with blue berries he gets to the ninth berry and laughs. The natives kill him. The two guys are in heaven. The fist guy says " you could've survived why did you laugh?" the second guy replies," I saw the third guy coming back with pineapples"

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What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder of a 7 year old child.

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What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

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Why do African-American people like fried chicken and watermelon? Because they are delicious food items.

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What killed the cat? Feline Leukemia

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

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knock, knock. come in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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