roses are red violets are blue i ate a peanut lets go have sex

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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What do you call a young child being beating to death with a spiked club? Arousing.

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What did Don King do with his new boxers? Put them on with a respectable pair of trousers.

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twilight

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what's black and blue and has red all over it? A dead body ^_^

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How is butter and your mom similar? They both consist of much fat.

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What did Taylor say to the other Taylor? Hi, my name is Taylor

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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- How can you call a person, who hasn't got a left eye, a left hand and a left leg? - All right.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

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a dyslexic man came on this website thinking it was made by his aunt Tina keoj he was sadly mistaken. it was just a bunch of jokes about dyslexic men going into bars

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A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

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Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

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Kid: Hey,can i have all the answers to this test please. Teacher: What the hell kid im the fricken teacher.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 8 9

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Why do guys like Halloween? Martin Luther posted the 95 theses in 1517 on this day.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

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Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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I walked into a bar and it hurt because it was metal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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