Knock Knock I don't have a door. I'm Homeless

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3 guys walk into a bar. The fourth guy ducks.

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Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

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Doorbell salesman.

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What did the man say after falling off a bridge? He didn't say anything. He died a painful and terrible death on impact.

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there were 2 sausages in a frying pan. One sausage says it sure is hot in here. The other one says WTF a talking sausage!

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Knock, Knock! Who's There? Your neighbor, I found your lost cat! Oh thanks!

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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2 men shot up a morgue, 16 bodies remain dead

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Q: What do you get when you mix a joke with a rhetorical question?

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin getting crushed by a sledgehammer.

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How much did the Holla Cost?

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Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

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Whats worse that a rhino hitting you in the face? A rhino with horns hitting you in the face

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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A man walked into a bar. He did this because he was blind and could not see the obstacle in his path.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

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Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

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Cold camel scrotum.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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There were two muffins in an oven one muffin said, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin said, "AHHH A TALKING MUFFIN!"

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What did Tim play with his friends? Nothing. He has no friends.

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tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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