What do you call a black person flying an airplane? a pilot you racist

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Your mother is so ugly that people make yo mamma jokes about her

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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-How old are you, Dick? -I'm 30 centimeters old

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What rhymes with 'stick' and is brown? A stick

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What did one musician say to the other? "We should have gone to college."

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Your mother is so ugly, because she was badly beaten.

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a retard lost...

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A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

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Q) what's black and white and red all over? A) a slaughtered zebra.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

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So a duck walks into a drugstore and asks the clerk for lip balm. The clerk asks, "How will you be paying for that?" to which the duck replies, "Cash."

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Knock knock Whos there? FUS ROH DAH

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Dubstep < Music

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What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Look out there's a bus in front of you

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What did the prostitute say to the nun? It's nice to see you again, Sister.

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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A Muslim walks out of a bar... Because he doesn't drink alcohol

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Knock knock Whoes there? ...

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What do Gay horses eat? Cheese.

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Why didn't Sally make it to school on time? She got savagely beaten and raped.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on how much you compress them.

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What looks like half an apple? The other half.

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what do you call a guy that has a mouth, but cannot speak? a poor freshman who has been commanded by a Senior not to speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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