"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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Derpy Hooves is retarded.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Why does it matter, they can't chuck wood in the first place.

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, how many does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

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How did the Jewish husband and wife stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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Why did the child step on a ball?

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what do you call a 40 year old man working at a burger king that dropped out of highschool dyslexic

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Oh my God, my friend just got hit by a truck. Lets go get ice cream

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There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Traveling Salesman.

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

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The WNBA

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A man sees a bum laughing. He asks the bum "Why are you laughing", at which point the bum replies "I'm a bum!"

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Why was Bootylatrice tardy for school? -She overslept.

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GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

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Romney 2012

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

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p p p penis. penis's are big and juicy

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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