Roses are red-ish Violets are blue-ish If it weren't for Jesus we'd all be jewish

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's white or grey or brown or green or black or yellow or purple ? Could be almost anything, really.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's brown and sticky? A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Ms. Smoot's class

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what is long, black and looks like a curly-hair? A curly-hair

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did the old man order the little girl into the car? Because he was her grandfather.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

How much does a polar bear way? Near 1,100 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why did Jerry Sandusky go to the shower room? He hadn't showered all week and was beginning to smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock knock Who's there A drummer A drummer who I'm not knocking on your door

thumb_up thumb_down +39

What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

thumb_up thumb_down +39

I spilled Spot Remover on my dog. Now he is blind and has chemical burns all over his body.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you call a dead baby lying in the road? A Tragedy

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q.whats the worlds funniest joke???? A.not this one this ones crap

thumb_up thumb_down +35

look at this bag of air it has some chips in it

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

thumb_up thumb_down +33

how long does it take for a black woman to poop? women dont poop, especially not halle berry

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How do you wake up lady gaga? Set an alarm for an appropriate time

thumb_up thumb_down +33

One day Satan, approached his dad and said: DADDY I love you so much, I want to be just like you! That story did not end up so well did it?

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops