Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

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An Englishman, an American, and an Australian walk into a bar. They speak English to each other.

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Heartlight

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When I see Debra walking her dog in the morning I often ask myself whose walking who!?

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women have rights

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What's worse than 1000 babies stapled to one tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 tress.

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How long did it take for Michael to screw in the lightbulb? 37 minutes. Michael has cerebral palsy.

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A genie came out of a lamp explain?

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Why do they censor everything on here? Because **** **** ******* *** ***** *****.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

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Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

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What do you call a black man? Jamal

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Oh my God, my friend just got hit by a truck. Lets go get ice cream

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What did Hitler say to the lady right next to him before the both committed suicide? I don't know, I don't understand German. I also wasn't there.

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There was a car crash in Mexico, 78 people were announced dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

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Alcatraz is reopened only for Kevin's ma

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So two cannibals are eating a clown. Cannibal one: Does this taste funny to you? Cannibal two: Considering that this man was a clown he must have been in poverty so he resulted to being an alcoholic and maybe over dosed on over the counter drugs. Cannibal one: Thank you for that reasonable answer.

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Why couldn't the pirate boy see the movie? He was blind.

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Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

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Why did the lion go to the doctor? He was hungry for man flesh. -John R-

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What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

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In Soviet Russia ? ??? ??? ????????.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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