What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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What did the Man say to the elephant Nothing this man does not speak, the elephant does though

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guess what? What? you have to guess...your mama

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Roses are red, Violets are violet. You guys really suck at making poems...

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What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

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A black guy, a white guy, and a mexican guy walk into a bar. They are good interracial friends that like to put down some brewski's with eachother

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Hi.

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What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

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What happened after Peter broke his toe? He went into cardiac arrest and died.

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Your mom is such a slut, she had unprotected sex at least once.

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whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

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"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

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Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

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What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

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What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

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Why did the donkey fall over Because it had A diabetic foot infection and had to have a non traumatic amputation of the lower hind leg.

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What's more addicting than a good book? Meth

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BF:Roses r red Violets r blue a face like ur's shuld b i n the zoo but dont worry i'll be there but not in the cage but laughing at u. GF:Wanna c a magic trick? POOF ur single

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Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

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Q:Ask me if I'm a tree Are you a tree A: No

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What did the black man say to the Mexican? What a fine day it is!

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A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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