Two girls walk into a bar. One ducks.

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How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

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Why did Sally fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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What's the difference between my car and a pile of dead babies? You can't eat my car.

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Q: What do you call a Deer with no eyes? A: No ideer. Q; What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no ideer.

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Why couldn't the black guy enter the room? He was too large to fit through the doorway therefore he turned around and left

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Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's alright now.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Elton. Elton who? Elton John

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A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

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knock knock

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what happens when you get ben roethlisberger, and a young college student? a very pleasant evening, helping ben cope with all the drama he has been in the past year leading him to the 2011 super bowl against the green bay packers.

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A Haiku Haiku's are easy But Sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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why was Austin sad cause his dick fell off

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Why did Martin go to school with no pants on? Because he had no legs.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Coming home and discovering that your wife has drowned your kids in the bathtub

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How did the blonde get blood on her Ipad? A terrible paper cut.

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What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

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Yo momma is so fat I really feel sorry for her.

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Whats better than sitting here writing anti jokes? Sitting in ENGLISH and writing anti jokes. Shoutout to Link Deas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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