How did the dragon get AIDS? He had sex with an HIV positive dragon months prior.

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Why did the kid punch the other kid. Because he was black.

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

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A man runs over a woman with his car, whose fault was it? The woman's for trying to cross the street in the dark without a crosswalk.

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Two Jews walk into a bar, and they were both served properly

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How do you get 1000 pokemon on to a bus? Pikachu!

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What do you call someone allergic to water ? Waterproof

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What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

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What time is it? I believe it's half past 10, sir. Damn, I'm late for a meeting. May I ask, what time are you supposed to be there? 11 O'clock Why sir you have half an hour left. No shiitt, sherlock

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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roses are blue violets, are orange, i am color blind

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Whats the best way to get a woman to sleep with you? Rape her

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Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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What does a rock become when it falls into the red sea? Wet.

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Kendall and Nick Fredick

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did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? hes all right now

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What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

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A giant watermelon falls on a man He's dead

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Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

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Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

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Q: why do shower heads have 11 holes? A: Jews only have 10 fingers

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how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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