Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nematode's. A Nematode is a type of round worm that lives under water, and while most are carnivorous, some feed on vegetation, such as pineapples.

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a black man, spanish man, and white man all fall off a building. and as they fall, i wonder: why are you laughing?

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A man walks into a bar. He has a drink. Then goes back home.

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? Their last names.

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A man walks into the market. He asks a young attractive employee in a smooth voice, "Do you have any honey here, baby?" The employee responds, "No sir. I'm sorry."

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Hellen Keller went to town, riding on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it ERRMMMMM UAHHHHHHHH...

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guess what chicken butt

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Not Steve Jobs

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where would you hide 100 dead jews in a car the ashtray because they were all cremated

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What do you do when you need shade? CALL RAYSEAN

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Dear Board of education, so are we.

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A dog walks into a bar. the bar tender asks" what'll you have?" the dog does not reply because dogs have not yet developed the type of voice box required to speak or the learning cappacity to be taught the English language.

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A fish swims up stream for his anual spawning season The fish dies from a heart attack because of the rigorous that took place.

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Why didn't Billy have legs? Because he's a fish.

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Nice weather we're having.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. False. Violets are violet

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a chinese man and an irishman walk into a bar. This is odd because these men are from countries extremely far apart from one another

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What's worse than being killed? Reading these jokes.

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On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me... Nothing, because I'm single.

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Why was the skeleton afraid to cross the road? He wasn't, and in fact was entirely unaware that said road existed given the fact that he was deceased; and therefore lacked any sensory organs and motor functions associated with crossing roads.

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Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

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women outside of the kitchen

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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