what did the turkey say on thanks giving? Nothing, he's dead, we ate him!

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twilight

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Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

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why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

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There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? In this situation, the minority.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. Ask me if I'm a bush. Are you a bush? No.

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "That's kind of ambiguous..."

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What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Grass is green.

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What did one ear say to the other ear? Did you hear that?

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Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

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A moose walks into a corner store and asks the lady where the Mashed potatoes are. The lady working behind the corner says "Down Aisle five..." The moose goes down aisle five and there are no Mashed Potatoes. -Tyler the Creator

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Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

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Matt Damon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Thats where the slaughterhouse is.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Im Really Stoned And you have met with a terrible fate haven't you?

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what are you called if your really funny but you not smart? the class clown

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Guy: If you can guess what's in my hand, you can have it. Girl: If it fits in one hand, you can keep it!

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GOOD AFTERNOON KIND SIR OR MADAM THIS IS THE KUNDALINI EXPRESS MAY I TAKE YOUR ORDER

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Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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