what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

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why did Suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock? whos there not Suzie

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only downer about having sex in the dark is........................ when u look out window and guy u thought u were sleeping with waving and laugh

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Anagram.

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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Osama Bin Laden and a monk walk into a bar. Mistaken Identity. It was the Dalai Lama, Osama is dead.

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What's funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitch-fork

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What do you call one lawyer shot dead in the street? Ghandi.

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whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

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Sometimes I hope into bed and pretend I'm a carrot!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

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What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

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Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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Q: what did the man say to the wall A: Nothing it's a wall therefore incapable of talking

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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Okay, So a Cow, a Lumberjack and a Fireman walk into a bar. The cow asks the bartender, "What kind of milk do you have?" The bartender looks confused and asks," Why would a cow want milk?" The cow replies,"I've been producing milk all my life and I've never had a chance to try it. I'd just like some milk." The bartender replies,"Okay we have whole milk, 2%, and skim milk. What'll you have?" The cow says,"Whole milk, I want the whole deal." The bartender obliges. Next the Lumberjack comes up to the bar. The bartender asks, "What'll you have?" The lumberjack asks for some syrup. The bartender inquiries,"What kind of syrup would you like?" The lumberjack answers,"Pure Maple, imitation, or chocolate. All work for me." The bartender turns and pours a shot of pure maple syrup and turns away. Finally the fireman walks up the the bartender and says, "Can I have a glass of water?" The bartender turn and ask inquisitively,"Why?" The fireman quickly replies,"TO PUT OUT THE FIRE!"...

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why did the first monkey fall out the tree? he was dead why did the second monkey fall out the tree? he was hit by the first one why did the third monkey fall out the tree? peer pressure why did the fourth monkey fall out the tree? he thought it was a game

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What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

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whats worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm? A naked chinese man jumping out of your trunk to beat you with a crowbar.

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What's the difference between Bobby and a plane? Bobby can be sexually molested.

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because ie was glued to the other one. why did the third elephant fall out ot the tree? Because he thought it was a game. why did the tree fall? Because there were elephants in it.

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the farmer lacked basic fence mending skills

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why was the man gay? because he likes men.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops