What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

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There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

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An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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A:why did sam fall of the wing ? B:why ? A:she had no arms. B:... A:knock knock. B: who is there ? A:not sam

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240

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What did the nazi say to the jew? im gay

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YOLO MAH BROLO

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Guess what these words are: boo_s p_n_s _ _ ndom s_x fu_k wan_er Answers: books,pants,random,six,funk,wander.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm about to kill you Don't scream, here's a lollipop

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Yor Mama is soooooooooooo fat, when she looked in da mirror... it cracked.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I threatened to throw a fridge at it

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A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

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Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

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Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

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What did one gorilla say to the other? Urgh.

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What do you call a seven foot Egyptian named Randy who trains leopards to uproot floral cactuses? Randy.

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Yo mama's so fat that she takes too muc oh fuck it I'm stuffed Henri and Chaz

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. Notice how Anti-Joke MISSPELLED "user", writing "uses" instead. Probably most of you didn't notice until I posted this :)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because once it had inadvertently escaped the farm it was being kept on it was startled and with no concept of road and pavement happened to traverse a road, with no real motive.

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A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock B: (frustrated), I thought we had that damn thing fixed!!!

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How do you know it's a Mexican's birthday? They bring cupcakes to school for your entire class to enjoy.

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It was just Michael J. Fox's birthday I wonder if he got in trouble for shaking his presents.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops