anti jokes

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What looks like half an apple? The other half.

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How do you get a one armed man to fall out of a tree? Wave.

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Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

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Why was Adolf Hitler such a bad man? Because he never kissed his wife goodbye.

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Q. how did the blond get a college degree in medicine? A. she studied hard and aced her final exam.

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Q; Why did the gas station attendant scream when 3 black men walked into his store? A: It was his surprise birthday party.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

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Why did the girl commit suicide? She has been abused severely for seven years by her pet kangaroo.

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What's blue and can't have sex? A blueberry

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What do you call someone in Manhattan who goes to see a Broadway show and then stops in at a local bar for a few drinks? A taxi, if they request you do so.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

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When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

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penis hehehehe

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What did the cancer patient say after the little boy told him a funny joke? I'm dying

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two black guys are in a car. Whose driving? The question is too broad. Either one of those men or unmentioned people could be driving the car.

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How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

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Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

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What has two eyes, two arms and two legs........ a woman who lost her baby to a miscarrage.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Penis... Okay...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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