How do you wake up Lady GAGA? A sludge hammer!

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What's after 9/11? 9/12

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why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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How many testicles did Adolph Hitler have? Two.

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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wanna hear a joke? not really

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Whats worst than a worm in you apple? 2 worms in your apple. Whats worst than two worms in your apple? An apple in your Worm. Whats worst than that? I don't know plenty of international tragedies such as plane crashes, and please don't say the holocaust. I was going to say 2 apples in your worm.

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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A duck waddles into a bar. He orders a drink and promtly drinks it vecause he has had a hard day at work.

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What is long and black The unemployment line

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Knock Knock! Who's there? So. So who? Cares.

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A man and two women walk into the a house. When they leave out come 2 babies with them. What happened in that house? They were babysitting.

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Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

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How do you make a mother at the playground cry? You steal her 3 year old daughter

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Two men are sitting on the couch watching sports, the first man farts, the second chuckles. They continue watching their program.

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What do you get when Chuck Norris meets Chuck Norris? A bad joke.

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What is worse than using the toilet and then realising there's no toilet paper? A racially motivated massacre.

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How do you turn a broken skateboard into a gleaming Rolls Royce? With magic.

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Male penises.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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