Knock Knock Hows there Theres no time for this you have AIDS

Knock knock Who's there? Sergeant Sergeant who? Sergeant John Clancy. I regret to inform you that Billy your son has just unfortunately been killed in the electronic fan factory in which he works.

how do u make a sausage roll push it down a hill

I don't do cocaine I just like the smell

Women's rights

I was visiting my grandad the other day and my phone died, I was really bored, he told me I rely too much on technology I replied with 'no you do' and Unplugged his life support

Your mother is so stupid she never finished College thus having to work many menial jobs to provide for her family.

What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

What do you call a pack of black people. Nothing you racist -_-

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? There are many, no human being is exactly alike.

knock knock who's there? i eat mop I eat mop who?

your on a bus and you ask your math teacher if you got the answers on the homework right and the bus crashes in the middle of an intersection.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven had a serious alcohol problem that gave him violent tendencies.

what do you call a boomerang that never comes back? stick

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She didnt have arms

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jewish people aren't edible.

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

Dislike if you are gay (watch how many dislikes this joke gets :P)

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What do you call a black man on a bicycle? A cyclist.

Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...