Why did the white man kill the black man? Because he was a racist that didn't care much for black people or their ways.

Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

Why is there world hunger? Because you touch yourself at night.

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

What has wheels and flies? An Airplane

Q: What do you get when you cross a rare breed of penguin with a horse. A: Well to be fair, turtles have shells

how do you make a family tan? You burn them in the house.

How do you make Al Gore cry? Kill his daughter.

Im going to france... Why To get french fries! Have fun Im back with a $10000bill to pay Wheres the fries Shit

whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

Whats brown and sticky? A peice of poo

Knock knock who's there? Hi! where from the church of latter day saints!

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

Would you like a better house, car, spouse, and a better life all together? No, no thanks.

The weels on the bus go...flat

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

what happens when two small children jump into a pool full of pedophiles? They splash around and have fun

What's long, hard, and wet? A difficult college exam that fell in a puddle of water

Justin Bieber having an erection.

A Jew walks into a Furness

your mom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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